Nitro Mega Lamb - Thursday, August 27, 2009 12:05:27 AM

If i have to talk myself into not hating my own guts before I leave the house each day, if it pains me to get dressed/put on makeup/fix my hair, but I do it anyway, if only so I don't turn into one of those girls in sweatpants and a scrunchy, at least I'm doing it, and I figure that as long as I'm doing it that matters.

If we had mandatory unzippings, let's say we all lined up, when it was your turn you reached a table where you were undone from throat to bellybutton and laid out all of your true feelings and mistakes, THEN who would be the fuck-up? 

Huh.

I've seen a lot of giving lately and that's really awesome 

I've made a conscious effort to breathe and go it alone instead of needlessly seeking cheap attention when I feel lonely for the person I really miss and that is huge for me.

I saw my mom on her birthday for the first time since I was nine years old.  I don't really let it touch me, how much it actually mattered to her, and I don't like to think about the extent of her pain and how I really feel about that, but I do acknowledge a warm electric feeling that lets me know it was a really, really good thing.

ex adyto cordis